Coronavirus Blues

From the Blonde Moments file

(Conversations with my daughter)
Leaving the grocery store:
Lauren- Why did we have to pay for this stuff?
Me- What? Why wouldn’t we?
Lauren- Uh…World War Z, Contagion, I Am Legend, Zombieland. No one pays for their stuff during a pandemic. Everyone knows this. We were cheated.
Me- Yeah, I am with you on this one.

A bit later…
Lauren- Okay, we need to find an island to go to in case people turn into zombies.
Me- How will that help?
Lauren-Everyone knows zombies can’t swim.
Me- Okay, Good point. But how will we get there.
Lauren- The judge has a boat (our neighbor is a justice of the peace). We could take his boat.
Me- And him and his wife?
Lauren- I don’t understand.
Me- What if they don’t want to give us the boat?
Lauren- Take ’em out. We have to make the hard choices dad.
Me- The boat fits 5. I’m sure the island can handle a lot of people.
Lauren- IT’S A VIRUS! NOBODY IS ALLOWED ON OUR ISLAND! MAKE THE HARD CHOICES DAD!

One minute later…
Lauren- I think I have a fever.
Me- Oh Shut up.

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